[2026/01/08 14:04] Sapphire: where'd we leave off?
[2026/01/08 14:05] Sonja Bikergrrl: you just completed the Ben Hur chariot race section
[2026/01/08 14:10] Sonja Bikergrrl: /me opens NCs and stuff
[2026/01/08 14:10] Sonja Bikergrrl: y'all got 1x potion of Cocae Colaris. Don't forget... did you note it somewhere?
[2026/01/08 14:11] Mecha: /me nods
[2026/01/08 14:11] Sonja Bikergrrl: So... you are on the trail of the dwarves' large iron still cylinder
[2026/01/08 14:12] Sonja Bikergrrl: this quest has been 1,000% successful
[2026/01/08 14:12] Sonja Bikergrrl: you last saw the still barely half hour ago, that's the good news
[2026/01/08 14:12] Sapphire: oh yeah need to update sheet
[2026/01/08 14:12] Joe: hey we know where the still is! It's strapped to the kobolds dragon
[2026/01/08 14:12] Sapphire: do we know what the potion does?
[2026/01/08 14:13] Sonja Bikergrrl: the less than good news is it was strapped to a pternadon, which was also carrying a bunch of kobolds, and, the still was mysteriously smoking mere moments after the town walls were blasted down violently and noisiliy
[2026/01/08 14:14] Sonja Bikergrrl: You've chased the kobold raiders to the side of a forest, at the foot of a low hill. Probably the kobolds' lair, and undoubtedly where you'll find... well, you'll have to go see, won't you?
[2026/01/08 14:14] Sonja Bikergrrl: Sapphire: you need to drink it and find out
[2026/01/08 14:15] Sapphire: Can we see the lair?
[2026/01/08 14:16] Sonja Bikergrrl: Aaaaaaaaaaaaand with that recap out of the way.... GGGRREEETTTTIIINNGGSSS Adventurers! Other players play cleverly thought out games, you get a mangled mish mash of old folklore and multinational global consumerism
[2026/01/08 14:16] Sonja Bikergrrl: Unless you are successful at seeing through trees... no
[2026/01/08 14:17] Sonja Bikergrrl: The elf by the reindeer says: "Before you go! Reach into this sack, I'm sure you'll find something useful!"
[2026/01/08 14:18] Sapphire: Bluebell peers, then directs her attention towards looking for tracks, before getting distracted by the sack. "Really? alright...." she heads over and dips her whole arm into the sack, reaching deep.
[2026/01/08 14:18] Sonja Bikergrrl: Roll a D6
[2026/01/08 14:20] Mecha: Dahla will go next, but not whole arm
[2026/01/08 14:20] Sonja Bikergrrl: also roll a D6
[2026/01/08 14:20] Sonja Bikergrrl: and Joe, too
[2026/01/08 14:20] D6: Mecha rolls 1
[2026/01/08 14:20] D6: Joe rolls 2
[2026/01/08 14:20] D6: Sapphire rolls 1
[2026/01/08 14:22] Sonja Bikergrrl: oh my
[2026/01/08 14:22] Sapphire: have we discovered the sack is a mimic?
[2026/01/08 14:22] Sonja Bikergrrl: Sapphire, Mecha, you pull out a small grey squirrel.
[2026/01/08 14:22] Joe: food. sorted.
[2026/01/08 14:23] Sonja Bikergrrl: The squirrels blink at you, and you get the feeling they need some command to activate.
[2026/01/08 14:23] Sonja Bikergrrl: Joe: you pull out something impossible
[2026/01/08 14:23] Mecha: Awww, so cute. Wanna ride on my shoulder?
[2026/01/08 14:23] Sonja Bikergrrl: a steaming mug of cocoa. Why doesn't it spill???
[2026/01/08 14:24] Sonja Bikergrrl: the squirrel doesn't seem to react to that.
[2026/01/08 14:24] Sapphire: "Hello?" she pets the squirrle, running a hand down it's back
[2026/01/08 14:24] Sonja Bikergrrl: Now, you seem ready to follow the trail of the thieving kobolds
[2026/01/08 14:25] Joe: ooh why doesn't it spill? Can I test that? Experiments with pouring the cocoa to see if it spills.
[2026/01/08 14:25] Sonja Bikergrrl: squirrel: does nothing
[2026/01/08 14:25] Mecha: Going to examine the squirrel. is it even alive or some kind of doll?
[2026/01/08 14:25] Sonja Bikergrrl: indeed not, Joe, for some reason it stays in the cup, steaming merrily
[2026/01/08 14:25] Sonja Bikergrrl: Some sort of festive construct, certainly, Mecha
[2026/01/08 14:25] Joe: is it drinkable ?
[2026/01/08 14:26] Sonja Bikergrrl: are you going to try and drink it?
[2026/01/08 14:26] Joe: no i offer it to the Elf
[2026/01/08 14:26] Sonja Bikergrrl: Elf: "No thanks, trying to give it up."
[2026/01/08 14:27] Joe: stashes the cocoa mug in a spare pocket
[2026/01/08 14:27] Mecha: look for a button or a switch
[2026/01/08 14:28] Sapphire: no squirlle reaction to the petting?
[2026/01/08 14:28] Sonja Bikergrrl: the squirrel construct is neither dominant nor submissive
[2026/01/08 14:28] Sonja Bikergrrl: as far as you can tell: no
[2026/01/08 14:29] Mecha: Simply shrugs and puts the squirell in her bag."Shall we?"
[2026/01/08 14:29] Sonja Bikergrrl: onwards and upwards, then?
[2026/01/08 14:30] Mecha: /me nods
[2026/01/08 14:30] Joe: sounds like a plan
[2026/01/08 14:30] Sapphire: She sets her squirrle on her hat. So they react stock still like a plushie, or uninterested like a bored pet?
[2026/01/08 14:31] Sonja Bikergrrl: okay... the trail is easy to follow, since they're dragging a sack. through trees and around rocks and then into a clearing before a large cave entrance. You can see the kobolds dragging the sack in.
[2026/01/08 14:31] Sonja Bikergrrl: Sapphire: More like a plushie awaiting a command
[2026/01/08 14:32] Mecha: following... carefully
[2026/01/08 14:32] Joe: "Diplomacy or Violence?"
[2026/01/08 14:32] Sonja Bikergrrl: What are you expecting?
[2026/01/08 14:33] Joe: expecting violence from the kobolds. Simply wondering if anyone has a different plan.
[2026/01/08 14:33] Sonja Bikergrrl: was more asking Mecha *GIGGLES*
[2026/01/08 14:33] Sapphire: how well armed do these 'bolds look?
[2026/01/08 14:34] Sonja Bikergrrl: you can see their asses, tails, and the large sack they're lugging, so, armed with whatever is in the sack
[2026/01/08 14:34] Mecha: Expecting to see if she can see anything inside the cave so we don't run in all crazy like
[2026/01/08 14:34] Sonja Bikergrrl: too far away to tell, Mecha
[2026/01/08 14:35] Joe: Are our weapons back to normal yet?
[2026/01/08 14:35] Sonja Bikergrrl: so... going to charge up, all crazy like?
[2026/01/08 14:35] Sonja Bikergrrl: nope :P
[2026/01/08 14:36] Mecha: Going in carefully
[2026/01/08 14:37] Sapphire: Keeping a bit back, sneaking along, glad she wears soft shoes for moments like these
[2026/01/08 14:37] Joe: also sneaking
[2026/01/08 14:38] Sonja Bikergrrl: The kobolds disappear into the cave. Before you can get much closer, a dozen kobolds burst out of the snow drifts on either side, like deranged Jack-in-the-box's. They're smaller than the usual kobolds you have seen, and are yipping and yapping at a very high pitch. Little hand-made booties, scarves, woolly hats and gloves complete their outfit.
[2026/01/08 14:38] Sonja Bikergrrl: Oh, and they're singing.
[2026/01/08 14:38] Sonja Bikergrrl: "Hee-hee-hee - they’re packin’ snow...
Snowballs are comin’, snowballs are comin’...
**Duck for cover - they might explode!"

"Tiny terrors charging through the frost,
Snowy mayhem, nothing’s ever lost,
If it goes boom, well - that’s the cost!
Snowballs are comin’... tonight!"

"Roll ’em tight, pack ’em hard,
Hide the powder in the yard,
Throw and scatter - hit ’em large!
Snowball fights are extra charged."

“Surprise… it wasn’t just snow!
Snowballs are comin’,
Snowballs are comin’,
Kobolds giggling…
Something’s gonna blow!"
[2026/01/08 14:38] Sonja Bikergrrl: Now what?
[2026/01/08 14:39] Joe: oh we were dumb we should have taken an empty sack from the reindeer sleighs to put all these brats in
[2026/01/08 14:39] Sonja Bikergrrl: *GIGGLES*
[2026/01/08 14:39] Joe: I have a cunning plan
[2026/01/08 14:40] Sapphire: "Ack!" She ducks down to back some snowballs.
[2026/01/08 14:40] Sonja Bikergrrl: Sapphire is tooling up!
[2026/01/08 14:40] Joe: These are younglings. If we can lead them away from the cave, we can swap them back for the metal still
[2026/01/08 14:41] Joe: -I suggest in character to kidnap the kids
[2026/01/08 14:41] Sonja Bikergrrl: interesting plan
[2026/01/08 14:41] Sonja Bikergrrl: Mecha?
[2026/01/08 14:41] Joe: assets: we have reindeers and squirrels
[2026/01/08 14:42] Mecha: Gonna start stocking up on snowballs
[2026/01/08 14:42] Sonja Bikergrrl: Roll initiative!
[2026/01/08 14:43] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 13
[2026/01/08 14:43] D20: Mecha rolls 6
[2026/01/08 14:44] Sonja Bikergrrl: Joe & Sapphire
[2026/01/08 14:45] D20: Joe rolls 1
[2026/01/08 14:45] D20: Sapphire rolls 16
[2026/01/08 14:45] Sonja Bikergrrl: Joe first, what do you plan doing?
[2026/01/08 14:47] Sonja Bikergrrl: (Followed by Mecha)
[2026/01/08 14:48] Joe: maybe we should gain the kids trust by snowball fighting them before tempting them back to the reindeers where we can bag 'em
[2026/01/08 14:49] Sonja Bikergrrl: okay, so, action? It's you first
[2026/01/08 14:49] Joe: make some snowballs
[2026/01/08 14:49] Sonja Bikergrrl: going to throw one?
[2026/01/08 14:49] Joe: hell yeah
[2026/01/08 14:50] Sonja Bikergrrl: d20
[2026/01/08 14:50] D20: Joe rolls 17
[2026/01/08 14:50] Sapphire: you said twelve kobolds?
[2026/01/08 14:51] Sonja Bikergrrl: You hurl a snowball at a kobold kiddie. It narrowly misses the little fellah, but not so far that his morale doesn't break. He turns tail and flees, hands above his head. "WWWAAHH! Why's everyone always target me?"
[2026/01/08 14:51] Sonja Bikergrrl: eleven, now. Mecha?
[2026/01/08 14:52] Mecha: Goona throw a snowball but trying it playfully. Not looking to injure, but to be playful.
[2026/01/08 14:52] Sonja Bikergrrl: d20
[2026/01/08 14:52] D20: Mecha rolls 13
[2026/01/08 14:53] Sonja Bikergrrl: You hit a kobold squarely with a snowball. He is immediately downcast. "Awh." He turns and wanders to the cave, but, at least there's hot rat on a stick waiting.
[2026/01/08 14:53] Mecha: wait....
[2026/01/08 14:53] Sonja Bikergrrl: kobold counter attack! They run about, hurling snowballs!
[2026/01/08 14:53] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 19
[2026/01/08 14:53] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 15
[2026/01/08 14:53] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 17
[2026/01/08 14:54] Sapphire: waaaaaaa
[2026/01/08 14:54] Sonja Bikergrrl: good lord.... two of them pelt Mecha with snowballs. They laugh and high five. "We got the ugly!" 2 points damage to Mecha
[2026/01/08 14:54] Sonja Bikergrrl: Sapphire next
[2026/01/08 14:54] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 4
[2026/01/08 14:54] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 8
[2026/01/08 14:54] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 1
[2026/01/08 14:54] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 13
[2026/01/08 14:54] Sonja Bikergrrl: oh my
[2026/01/08 14:54] Sonja Bikergrrl: three incoming snowballs
[2026/01/08 14:55] Mecha: Ugly? That's hurtful. I'm gonna tell my big sister on you
[2026/01/08 14:55] Sonja Bikergrrl: one silly sod hits his friend squarely in the face with a snowball. So that's him outta the fight.
[2026/01/08 14:55] Sonja Bikergrrl: And Joe!
[2026/01/08 14:55] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 12
[2026/01/08 14:55] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 19
[2026/01/08 14:55] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 14
[2026/01/08 14:55] Sonja Bikergrrl: One snowball catches Joe in the back of the head. 1 point damage.
[2026/01/08 14:55] Sonja Bikergrrl: Sapphire!
[2026/01/08 14:56] Sapphire: ack! She's gonna toss her snowball at whoever seems to be most meanacing her and then dive rolling away.
[2026/01/08 14:56] D20: Sapphire rolls 15
[2026/01/08 14:57] Sonja Bikergrrl: And you slap a snowball right at a kobold, who drops his snow and runs to the cave. There's lots of roasted rat waiting.
[2026/01/08 14:57] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 4
[2026/01/08 14:57] Joe: I run over to the cave entrance to block it with my presence
[2026/01/08 14:57] Sonja Bikergrrl: Kobolds check morale - they're up for more!
[2026/01/08 14:58] Sonja Bikergrrl: d20 Joe - check DEX, -2 penalty
[2026/01/08 14:58] Sonja Bikergrrl: must roll under 12
[2026/01/08 14:58] D20: Joe rolls 3
[2026/01/08 14:59] Joe: Dex 14
[2026/01/08 14:59] Sonja Bikergrrl: You sprint for the cave! And there you stand, like a goalkeeper.
[2026/01/08 14:59] Sonja Bikergrrl: Except.... you hear something behind you. Uh oh.
[2026/01/08 14:59] Sonja Bikergrrl: Mecha!
[2026/01/08 15:00] Mecha: They got Dhala and if the rules ar eright she is out of the snowball fight. So she heads to the cave as well
[2026/01/08 15:00] Sonja Bikergrrl: are you sure?
[2026/01/08 15:01] Mecha: Actually, no better idea.
[2026/01/08 15:01] Mecha: Gonna throw another snowball at a kid. Same thing, playful
[2026/01/08 15:01] Sonja Bikergrrl: d20
[2026/01/08 15:01] D20: Mecha rolls 20
[2026/01/08 15:01] Sonja Bikergrrl: oh my
[2026/01/08 15:02] Sonja Bikergrrl: You hurl a snowball at a kobold, and send him flying back
[2026/01/08 15:02] Mecha: Oh shit... Sorry
[2026/01/08 15:02] Sonja Bikergrrl: straight into another kobold. Both go down in a tangle of arms, legs, tails, curses, and a spray of snow.
[2026/01/08 15:04] Sonja Bikergrrl: kobolds do not out number you by more than 3:2 now, the remaining upright kobold kiddies pause only to help up their fallen comrades and they scatter into the woods, yapping like overexcited chiauas
[2026/01/08 15:04] Sonja Bikergrrl: The cave awaits, once you get past Joe!
[2026/01/08 15:04] Joe: so much for that puppy-napping plan
[2026/01/08 15:04] Mecha: Turn around and head towards Joe
[2026/01/08 15:05] Sonja Bikergrrl: The cave is in a sheer cliff face. There's a flickering glow coming from within, and a crackling of a huge fire blazing away inside. The cave starts 30' wide, but narrows to a passage of 10' wide.
[2026/01/08 15:06] Sapphire: "These kobolds... hey seem like they're having a lot fo fun, right?"
[2026/01/08 15:06] Sonja Bikergrrl: and if you can't have fun at Yuletide, when can you have fun?
[2026/01/08 15:06] Joe: yeah theyre loving it
[2026/01/08 15:06] Mecha: That's what I was thinking. The snowball fight was a game we hit one and they went inside here.
[2026/01/08 15:08] Sonja Bikergrrl: So, heading in?
[2026/01/08 15:08] Mecha: yep
[2026/01/08 15:08] Sapphire: yeah
[2026/01/08 15:08] Joe: yes
[2026/01/08 15:08] Sonja Bikergrrl: /me smirks the smirk of the DM about to give you the BBEG fight to end all BBEG fights
[2026/01/08 15:09] Sonja Bikergrrl: As the cave narrows, you can hear movement, high pitched voices. “DRAGON BREATH READY!” ... "PACK MORE PEBBLES!”...
[2026/01/08 15:09] Sonja Bikergrrl: Someone want to roll Perception?
[2026/01/08 15:09] D20: Joe rolls 1
[2026/01/08 15:09] Sonja Bikergrrl: oh my, critical success!
[2026/01/08 15:09] D20: Sapphire rolls 4
[2026/01/08 15:09] Joe: smug cat grin
[2026/01/08 15:10] Sonja Bikergrrl: You notice something scrawled on a wall: “FRUT-KAKE BAD! No eat! No eat! Only hurts when the tallfolk shout mean things!” This would appear to be a Clue that Fruit Cake does not like to be disrespected or insulted.
[2026/01/08 15:11] Sonja Bikergrrl: But, no time to dwell on that. The cave opens up to a wide area, lit by a huge fire, with smaller caves branching off. There's several (ie., five) things you notice....
[2026/01/08 15:11] Sonja Bikergrrl: /me pauses
[2026/01/08 15:11] Sonja Bikergrrl: 1. Directly across the cave: a huge winged lizard, crested head on a long neck, nodding and swaying, looking somewhat inebriated. A barrel of dwarven festive stout nearby, half full.
[2026/01/08 15:11] Mecha: Dahla looks around curiously
[2026/01/08 15:12] Sapphire: "What? But fruit cake is amazing. Especially with a load of brandy in it..."
[2026/01/08 15:12] Sonja Bikergrrl: 2. Under the huge winged lizard: the dwarves' still, lying on its' side, the open top pointed directly at the party as a pair of kobolds ramming bulging heavy sacks into the great gaping hole, sweating and praying loudly. Meanwhile, another kobold is pouring powder into a hole at the base, yapping, "More powder! More powder!". A team of four kobolds are pulling at straps, to point the still at the cave mouth - and the party. One other kobold stands nearby, hands clasped together, chanting. This is the Prophet of Boom; he claims divine inspiration, but by the look of it, he's actually delirious, or drunk.
[2026/01/08 15:12] Sonja Bikergrrl: 3. Around the fire, stolen sacks of loot, and kobolds rummaging for weapons. There's one particularly large kobold, apparantly the chief, pulling on The Red Cloak of Festive Terror. It's trimmed with fake fur, and the kobolds insist it makes the chief immune to cold. (It doesn’t, but it looks fabulous. By kobold standards, anyway). On his head, the The Snow-Skull Crown, made of iced gingerbread with gumdrops. The chief believes it channels winter spirits; it has bits missing, since he bites bits of it when stressed, like now.
[2026/01/08 15:13] Sonja Bikergrrl: /me pawses again
[2026/01/08 15:14] Mecha: raises an eyebrow as she looks at this
[2026/01/08 15:14] Sonja Bikergrrl: 4. To one side, The Royal Sled of Conquest, in reality a shoddy children’s sled. The tribe think it's a battle-chariot, and two kobolds are pulling it with pride out of harms' way.
[2026/01/08 15:15] Sonja Bikergrrl: 5. There's kobold cooks peering out of various caves, their smocks splattered with assorted sticky stuff. They yap excitedly, and duck back into their cave kitchens.
[2026/01/08 15:15] Sonja Bikergrrl: and...
[2026/01/08 15:15] Sonja Bikergrrl: /me pawses again for Drama
[2026/01/08 15:15] Sapphire: "Kobolds of this hill! we come to treat with you, that we might arrive at peaceful relations once again." She announces, eyeing the people stuffing powder into the still, and lobbing the snowball she was still carrying into the powder to dampen it.
[2026/01/08 15:16] Sonja Bikergrrl: The kobolds manning (kobolding?) the tube cackle as they light the fuse...
[2026/01/08 15:16] Sonja Bikergrrl: ...it hisses and splutters...
[2026/01/08 15:16] Sonja Bikergrrl: ...and nothing happens...
[2026/01/08 15:16] Sonja Bikergrrl: ...time to roll initiative!
[2026/01/08 15:16] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 6
[2026/01/08 15:16] D20: Mecha rolls 15
[2026/01/08 15:16] D20: Joe rolls 6
[2026/01/08 15:16] D20: Sapphire rolls 12
[2026/01/08 15:17] Sonja Bikergrrl: Kobolds and Joe go first!
[2026/01/08 15:17] Sonja Bikergrrl: The kobolds at one cave cackle and stand aside as a -huge- figure tramps out, freshly baked
[2026/01/08 15:17] Joe: I plan to sit on top of the dragon in such a way as to steer its head with my hands
[2026/01/08 15:18] Sonja Bikergrrl: It's a Gingerbread Golem.... A festive construct of baked dough, sugary mortar, and pure seasonal menace.
[2026/01/08 15:18] Sonja Bikergrrl: I'm not sure the pternadon is going to let you do that. Plus, it's drunk, and, probably will vomit on you.
[2026/01/08 15:19] Sonja Bikergrrl: also, you might have your hands full with the gingerbread golem
[2026/01/08 15:20] Joe: can i dunk it in my unspillable cocoa mug?
[2026/01/08 15:20] Sonja Bikergrrl: Most of the kobolds in the cave are yapping in sheer hysterics, bouncing their fists up and down, yapping: "Fight! Fight! Fight!"
[2026/01/08 15:21] Sonja Bikergrrl: The gingerbread golem is 5' high, your cup is... what... 5" across at most?
[2026/01/08 15:22] Sonja Bikergrrl: Mind you, a few kobolds are jumping up and down on the iron tube, yapping "Boom! Boom! Boom!"
[2026/01/08 15:22] Joe: thats not a mug its a cauldron
[2026/01/08 15:22] Mecha: 5 feet high?
[2026/01/08 15:22] Sonja Bikergrrl: five foot golem, five inch mug
[2026/01/08 15:22] Joe: no 5" wide for a mug
[2026/01/08 15:23] Sonja Bikergrrl: measure a mug yourself and tell me how you dunk a mansize figure in, then :P
[2026/01/08 15:23] Joe: does the golem have fingers?
[2026/01/08 15:23] Joe: or toes?
[2026/01/08 15:23] Sonja Bikergrrl: /me -was- giving you the benefit of generous scales
[2026/01/08 15:23] Sonja Bikergrrl: it's got fists and feet and it's striding towards you
[2026/01/08 15:23] Joe: aw thanks I've heard that before
[2026/01/08 15:24] Joe: I shout threasn to soak the golem with my magical mug of infinite cocoa
[2026/01/08 15:24] Sapphire: that said, pouring cocoa on gingerbread seems like a plan
[2026/01/08 15:24] Sonja Bikergrrl: well, give it a go and see
[2026/01/08 15:24] Joe: Yeas but i can't get the cocoa to spill out - but the golem doesn't know that
[2026/01/08 15:24] Joe: *threats
[2026/01/08 15:25] Sonja Bikergrrl: /me is NOT the DM to say "no" if a player -insists-
[2026/01/08 15:25] Sonja Bikergrrl: okay... D20
[2026/01/08 15:25] Joe: really? Aw I should have stuck to the sit-on-the-dragons-head plan
[2026/01/08 15:25] D20: Joe rolls 7
[2026/01/08 15:25] Sonja Bikergrrl: DEX check, passed
[2026/01/08 15:26] Joe: 7 to threaten gingerbread golem with a good soaking of cocoa
[2026/01/08 15:26] Sonja Bikergrrl: roll d6
[2026/01/08 15:26] D6: Joe rolls 5
[2026/01/08 15:26] Sonja Bikergrrl: The cocoa dissolves gingerbread, inflicting 5 points of damage.
[2026/01/08 15:27] Sonja Bikergrrl: However that was magical healing cocoa, which heals 5 damage.
[2026/01/08 15:27] Joe: oh for the sake of santa
[2026/01/08 15:27] Sapphire: :O
[2026/01/08 15:27] Sonja Bikergrrl: don't look at me, I just interpretate the result
[2026/01/08 15:27] Sapphire: look at it this way!
[2026/01/08 15:27] Joe: hey hey is there any cocoa left to dip Sappire or Mecha in ?
[2026/01/08 15:27] Sonja Bikergrrl: You have no more Mugs of Healing Cocoa.
[2026/01/08 15:27] Sapphire: we have successfully potion-tested your mug
[2026/01/08 15:27] Sapphire: oh
[2026/01/08 15:27] Sonja Bikergrrl: indeed :D
[2026/01/08 15:28] Sonja Bikergrrl: Golem punches at Jow
[2026/01/08 15:28] Sonja Bikergrrl: sorry, laughing too much to type
[2026/01/08 15:28] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 7
[2026/01/08 15:28] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 3
[2026/01/08 15:28] Sonja Bikergrrl: Two huge fists fly past Joes' nose!
[2026/01/08 15:28] Sapphire: take a bite outta crime, joe!
[2026/01/08 15:28] Sonja Bikergrrl: Sapphire - any potions you want to test?
[2026/01/08 15:29] Sapphire: Naw, I'm slinking around behind the gingerbread golem and checking the kitchen for fluids
[2026/01/08 15:29] Sonja Bikergrrl: you sure you want to split the party?
[2026/01/08 15:30] Sapphire: how far of a split is it?
[2026/01/08 15:31] Sonja Bikergrrl: Far enough that it'll take you a round of walking past dozens of kobolds, into a cave that is out of reach, and meeting goodness knows what. A maddened chef with a cleaver, and that's if you're lucky.
[2026/01/08 15:33] Sapphire: ugh, that sounds much less viable. I'll sneak around in this room, I heard you mention a couldron of possibly soup or booze?
[2026/01/08 15:34] Sonja Bikergrrl: A half empty barrel of dwarven stout, beside an inebriated pternadon, and that'll put you -right- in front of a huge iron tube stuffed with gunpowder and gravel. With a lit fuse.
[2026/01/08 15:34] Sonja Bikergrrl: also... you gotta walk past a few dozen kobolds...
[2026/01/08 15:34] Sapphire: so what's the layout that *doesn*t have me walking past a dozen kobolds?
[2026/01/08 15:35] Sonja Bikergrrl: what can I say... Christmas parties are chaotic
[2026/01/08 15:35] Sonja Bikergrrl: uhm... you could walk through the fire... but... you'll be on fire
[2026/01/08 15:35] Sonja Bikergrrl: or you could cast a spell... fling something... attack the golem...
[2026/01/08 15:36] Sonja Bikergrrl: idk. Bound to be something you can do
[2026/01/08 15:36] Joe: roll the barrell ?
[2026/01/08 15:37] Sonja Bikergrrl: ...see above...
[2026/01/08 15:37] Sapphire: rolling the barrel? that sounds like a plan, rolling it into the golem could work
[2026/01/08 15:38] Sonja Bikergrrl: so what you doing?
[2026/01/08 15:39] Sapphire: can i move the barrel without going through a crowd?
[2026/01/08 15:40] Sonja Bikergrrl: As already indicated: No.
[2026/01/08 15:40] Sapphire: it sounds like there's a bunch of stuff in the room but none of it is meant to be reachable
[2026/01/08 15:40] Sonja Bikergrrl: unless you lasso it, or use telekinesis, or convice a kobold
[2026/01/08 15:40] Sapphire: so going around behind the golem and casting Mirror Image so that it can't tell which is the real me and worth defending it
[2026/01/08 15:40] D4: Sapphire rolls 2
[2026/01/08 15:40] Sonja Bikergrrl: Why can you not do that in front of the golem?
[2026/01/08 15:41] Sapphire: flanking
[2026/01/08 15:41] Sapphire: a bunch of mees in front doesn't help combat any
[2026/01/08 15:41] Sonja Bikergrrl: are you flanking, or, are you casting the spell?
[2026/01/08 15:42] Sapphire: casting?
[2026/01/08 15:42] Sapphire: flanking is a movement
[2026/01/08 15:43] Sonja Bikergrrl: okay... you cast the spell Mirror Image
[2026/01/08 15:43] Sonja Bikergrrl: D4
[2026/01/08 15:44] Sapphire: it got a 2
[2026/01/08 15:44] Sonja Bikergrrl: okay, three images, enjoy them!
[2026/01/08 15:45] Sonja Bikergrrl: Mecha: What you doing?
[2026/01/08 15:45] Mecha: Pouncing the ginger giant to break pieces off. It's a cookie and Dahla is hungry
[2026/01/08 15:46] Sonja Bikergrrl: d20
[2026/01/08 15:46] Sonja Bikergrrl: and breaking pieces off... well, hit first
[2026/01/08 15:47] D20: Mecha rolls 1
[2026/01/08 15:48] Sonja Bikergrrl: /me facepalms
[2026/01/08 15:48] Mecha: And crash headfirst into a wall instead
[2026/01/08 15:48] Sonja Bikergrrl: okay, d20 again
[2026/01/08 15:49] D20: Mecha rolls 14
[2026/01/08 15:49] Sonja Bikergrrl: well, the bad news is, you miss the gingerbread golem
[2026/01/08 15:50] Sonja Bikergrrl: the worse news is, you crash into Sapphire, and you, her, images, are sprawled on the floor. The kobolds erupt in howls of laughter. The king bites a piece of his crown off, eyes wide as saucers
[2026/01/08 15:51] Sonja Bikergrrl: And back to Joe! What are you planning next?
[2026/01/08 15:53] Joe: I suppose attacking the gingerbread golem with a double eaded candy cane is about the best i can muster right now
[2026/01/08 15:53] Sapphire: "Buh!"
[2026/01/08 15:53] Sonja Bikergrrl: D20
[2026/01/08 15:53] D20: Joe rolls 12
[2026/01/08 15:53] Mecha: Sorry.. slipped on a snowball
[2026/01/08 15:54] Sonja Bikergrrl: hits AC 4
[2026/01/08 15:54] Sonja Bikergrrl: a hit! Roll D6
[2026/01/08 15:54] D6: Joe rolls 4
[2026/01/08 15:55] Sonja Bikergrrl: The hit lands harder than you thought. Shards of gingerbread fly in all directions! It's badly damaged.... and still hostile.
[2026/01/08 15:55] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 2
[2026/01/08 15:55] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 20
[2026/01/08 15:55] Sonja Bikergrrl: /me winces
[2026/01/08 15:55] Sapphire: are the shards also hostile?
[2026/01/08 15:56] Sonja Bikergrrl: no, they're edible
[2026/01/08 15:56] D6: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 3
[2026/01/08 15:56] Sonja Bikergrrl: well, three points of bludgeoning damage to Joe
[2026/01/08 15:56] Sonja Bikergrrl: also, save vs Breath Weapon for that crit
[2026/01/08 15:57] Sonja Bikergrrl: must roll over 14
[2026/01/08 15:57] D20: Joe rolls 12
[2026/01/08 15:57] Sonja Bikergrrl: Failed!
[2026/01/08 15:58] Joe: the humiliation
[2026/01/08 15:58] Sonja Bikergrrl: Three things happen to you.
[2026/01/08 15:58] Sonja Bikergrrl: You are....
[2026/01/08 15:58] Sonja Bikergrrl: 1. lightly coated in sticky crumbs
[2026/01/08 15:58] Sonja Bikergrrl: 2. suffer –1 to attack rolls for 1 round
[2026/01/08 15:58] Sonja Bikergrrl: 3. very annoyed
[2026/01/08 15:58] Sonja Bikergrrl: Sapphire!
[2026/01/08 15:58] Joe: okay some role-playing required next round
[2026/01/08 15:59] Sapphire: how much of the gingerbread golem is up?
[2026/01/08 15:59] Sonja Bikergrrl: ...what have you been doing the past two hours???
[2026/01/08 15:59] Sonja Bikergrrl: About 99.9% of it
[2026/01/08 15:59] Joe: no i meant acting in character
[2026/01/08 15:59] Joe: sorry sapphire
[2026/01/08 15:59] Sonja Bikergrrl: ...whate have you been do... eh, nvm
[2026/01/08 16:00] Sapphire: Alright, getting up from behind knocked over and trying to use a dagger to crack the joints of the angry cookie
[2026/01/08 16:00] Sonja Bikergrrl: d20
[2026/01/08 16:02] D20: Sapphire rolls 19
[2026/01/08 16:02] Sonja Bikergrrl: OOoh!
[2026/01/08 16:02] Sonja Bikergrrl: A bit!
[2026/01/08 16:02] Sonja Bikergrrl: roll d4
[2026/01/08 16:03] Sonja Bikergrrl: except... it's not a dagger, but, a pointy stick
[2026/01/08 16:03] D4: Sapphire rolls 2
[2026/01/08 16:03] Sonja Bikergrrl: now I think on it, that's still kinda dangerous
[2026/01/08 16:04] Sonja Bikergrrl: The gingerbread golem collapses in a shower of gingerbread crumbs and a few pieces of jellied fruit and some frosting.
[2026/01/08 16:04] Sonja Bikergrrl: You have defeated the gingerbread golem.
[2026/01/08 16:04] Sapphire: Se grabs one of the jellied fruits, feeling it in her off hand
[2026/01/08 16:05] Sapphire: "So! Now we have defeated your champion!"
[2026/01/08 16:05] Sonja Bikergrrl: The kobolds all look on, mouths open, and, there's the sound of tinkling music... the kobolds look from you, to, one of the kitchen caves, at the next foe to face you
[2026/01/08 16:05] Joe: yay! filling my pockets with bits of gingerbread, obviously
[2026/01/08 16:05] Sonja Bikergrrl: Don't celebrate too soon...
[2026/01/08 16:05] Sonja Bikergrrl: What comes stepping out of the kitchen....
[2026/01/08 16:06] Sonja Bikergrrl: ...is....
[2026/01/08 16:06] Mecha: Picking up a piece of Gingerbread and nomming it. Gotta have energy for the next fight
[2026/01/08 16:06] Sonja Bikergrrl: It resembles a humanoid dancer sculpted from crystallised sugar, spun sugar wings, and shimmering purple plum-glaze skin. Her eyes glow with glittering sweetness, and her delicate voice chimes like silver bells.
[2026/01/08 16:06] Sonja Bikergrrl: Mecha: save vs poison.
[2026/01/08 16:06] Joe: "It is an angel!"
[2026/01/08 16:06] Sonja Bikergrrl: I'm afraid not....
[2026/01/08 16:07] Sonja Bikergrrl: it's.... the Sugarplum Fairy
[2026/01/08 16:07] D20: Mecha rolls 2
[2026/01/08 16:07] Sonja Bikergrrl: Failed save :P
[2026/01/08 16:07] Sapphire: "What brings you here?"
[2026/01/08 16:07] Sonja Bikergrrl: Mecha: sugar rush. Gain 1hp, +1 to hit, +1 to damage.
[2026/01/08 16:08] Sonja Bikergrrl: Sugarplum Fairy regards Sapphire with icy eyes, raises her wand, and steps forwards to attack!
[2026/01/08 16:08] Mecha: woot!
[2026/01/08 16:08] Sonja Bikergrrl: Mecha, technically it's your go
[2026/01/08 16:10] Mecha: wooden training sword attack on sugary sweetness
[2026/01/08 16:10] Sonja Bikergrrl: d20
[2026/01/08 16:10] D20: Mecha rolls 11
[2026/01/08 16:11] Mecha: *So with plus 1 that's a 12
[2026/01/08 16:11] Sonja Bikergrrl: She's a fast mover, and dances aside easily, with a tinkle of bells.
[2026/01/08 16:11] Sonja Bikergrrl: Close, but, no cigar
[2026/01/08 16:11] Sonja Bikergrrl: Joe! What are you going to do?
[2026/01/08 16:11] Joe: Still smarting from the fight with the gingerbread golem, fueled by the sort of anger which boosts testosterone and therefore increasing my manly charms, I full on use my Charisma to try to woo the sugar plum fairy into a romantic christmas love story
[2026/01/08 16:12] Sonja Bikergrrl: /me blinks
[2026/01/08 16:12] Sonja Bikergrrl: /me sighs
[2026/01/08 16:12] Sonja Bikergrrl: that....
[2026/01/08 16:12] Sonja Bikergrrl: ...is actually in the statblock
[2026/01/08 16:12] Mecha: *By the Maker, he's casting the spell Hallmork movie*
[2026/01/08 16:12] Sonja Bikergrrl: Charisma check, must roll under 18
[2026/01/08 16:13] D20: Joe rolls 14
[2026/01/08 16:13] Joe: "Hey sweetness." big knightly grin
[2026/01/08 16:14] Sonja Bikergrrl: Sugarplum Fairy pauses, her head to one side, listening, then, covers her mouth as she giggles coquettishly. Blushing, she passes Joe a crystalized plum, and POOF pops out of sight, leaving just a fading tinkle of bells behind.
[2026/01/08 16:14] Joe: "Nooo! Come back!"
[2026/01/08 16:14] D20: Sonja Bikergrrl rolls 18
[2026/01/08 16:15] Sonja Bikergrrl: Kobolds fail their save. They reach for tissues... well, filth-stained rags.... and dab their eyes, totally in the romantic moment
[2026/01/08 16:15] Sonja Bikergrrl: But....
[2026/01/08 16:15] Sonja Bikergrrl: Have you all forgot something?
[2026/01/08 16:16] Joe: apparnetly so
[2026/01/08 16:16] Mecha: The still, the king/ chief. The fact that one of our party just pulled a play from the bards handbook?
[2026/01/08 16:16] Sapphire: time?
[2026/01/08 16:16] Sapphire: the burning fuze?
[2026/01/08 16:16] Sonja Bikergrrl: indeed! You've forgotten!
[2026/01/08 16:16] Sonja Bikergrrl: So... shall we see what you have forgot next time - Sunday? I don't want to rush this.
[2026/01/08 16:17] Joe: a whole week without my sugarplum fairy?
[2026/01/08 16:18] Sonja Bikergrrl: three days!
[2026/01/08 16:18] Joe: an eternity
[2026/01/08 16:19] Sonja Bikergrrl: probably a little over an hour to do it justice... and I hate rushing and making a damp squib out of what you really should get a bang out of
[2026/01/08 16:21] Sapphire: i'm sure we'll all be devastated
[2026/01/08 16:21] Sonja Bikergrrl: so... Sunday for the explosive finale
[2026/01/08 16:21] Sonja Bikergrrl: ;-)
[2026/01/08 16:22] Joe: thanks for another fun session DM Sonja
[2026/01/08 16:22] Sonja Bikergrrl: oh, don't thank me just yet
[2026/01/08 16:22] Sonja Bikergrrl: a one shot ain't over until the TPK ;-)
[2026/01/08 16:23] Sapphire: thank you for running anyhow